Dealing with Stress While Parenting

Dealing with stress is pretty much unavoidable nowadays with family and work responsibilities, household chores and maintenance, financial crisis, illnesses, and more. If you are feeling the crunch of stress and it is affecting your relationship with your children, know that you are not alone.

During the pandemic, millions of parents found themselves quarantining during the most stressful time this generation has ever encountered. Now that lockdowns are lifted in most places, parents are still dealing with stress.

Tips for dealing with stress as a parent

Your days are crammed full of work, chores, and errands. You probably feel conflicted between wondering if you are failing as a parent and needing personal space. Dealing with stress must be a priority if you are going to be the best parent you can be.

Ask yourself the following questions:

• Are you feeling guilty for having to work and provide for the family?
• Do you snap at your children more often?
• Does it feel like life is out of your control?
• Are your children displaying aggressive behaviors?
• Are your children being overly emotional, like having crying jags?
• Are you tired all the time?
• Is your sleep disrupted?
• Do you feel sad or anxious most of the time?
• Is it getting harder to answer your children or get out of bed?

These are serious symptoms of burnout and can happen to anyone, especially parents with too many responsibilities and insufficient help. Take note: if you have thoughts about harming yourself or your children, seek help immediately.

These thoughts are intrusive, and a licensed professional can help you shut them down and see the truth behind them. If this is you, reach out to our office, call 911, or call 988 for immediate support.

The following is a list of tips you can implement today to try to balance your work-family life while dealing with stress.

Take time out for you.

You need time alone to recharge your batteries. It does not need to be a weekend away (unless you want it). Instead, use moments throughout the day to do something for you. Maybe that means you read a book for twenty minutes after your children fall asleep.

Or, it might be taking a quick walk while everyone is still sleeping. Even a five- or ten-minute coffee break can help relieve stress and reset your attitude.

Look for times that you can snatch for moments of peace. Some parents arrive at their child’s school 45 minutes early and park in the pickup lane so that they can read a book or listen to a podcast. Give yourself permission to try different things to discover what works for you.

Get active with your kids (and without).

Doing something active with your children teaches them how to prioritize physical movement and health. It is also a great bonding experience. Even older children may deny it and look back on a family activity as memorable and fun.

Getting active also relieves stress and provides a constructive outlet for emotions. Consider hiking through a nearby park or cycling around town with your family. Or make it a day, and take the group swimming.

Whatever you do, don’t forget to carve out some activity for yourself sans the kids. Yoga and Pilates are excellent practices before bed as the flows are typically slow. If you have younger children, try fitting in a workout during their naptime. You might be amazed at how efficient a 20-minute workout can be if you are consistent.

Plan for adventure days and nights.

Sometimes our lives feel uncontrollable because we are stuck in the routine of school-work-home. We are not actually living our lives when we are home. Consider planning adventures for your family on the first of each month.

Is there something going on in town, like a play or musical? Does the local museum have a special exhibit? What about nearby festivals? Take a look at the dates of events near you and schedule one or two. If cost is an issue, look for free or low-cost options, like parties for church groups, festivals, book sales, and children’s programs at your local library.

These adventures allow everyone to work off stress and tension while bonding with each other.

Schedule some events for yourself.

While you are researching family-friendly events in your area for next month, look for something special for you. Maybe you would like to hire a sitter and attend a special event at a park. Perhaps there is a new restaurant in town you would like to try.

If you are married, talk with your spouse about starting a date night once or twice a month. These small dates keep your marriage alive by focusing your conversations on each other instead of the children. If you are a new parent, this might be difficult at first, but strengthening your marriage is essential to having a solid foundation as a family.

Have a contingency plan.

You might need to get creative if you need time to finish a project, cook dinner, or drink a cup of coffee. Have a contingency plan in place. If you need some time to get dinner together, allow your children to have screen time on the television or tablets.

They will consider it a special time if they do not usually do this. Or, keep a list of movies that the children can only watch while you are preparing dinner, working from home, or needing a break.

Not everyone has another parent in the home that can help shoulder the responsibility. Instead, make sure you have people you can trust that you can call on in a pinch. Do you need to hire a sitter?

Are your parents, aunts, uncles, neighbors, or grandparents willing to watch the kids if you need a break? If they agree, don’t take advantage of their kindness. If you agree to return at a specific time, make good on your promise.

Try to leave your stress at work.

Children pick up on their parents’ duress. When dealing with stress, have you noticed that your child seems to become overemotional, crying or throwing temper tantrums? Your child may display behavioral issues at school and home if they are older. They can feel your stress and fear about the future. Unfortunately, they do not know how to make it better for you.

The behaviors may worsen if you lose your temper with your children because of stress. If they do not display observable behaviors, you might notice that they withdraw from the family, isolating themselves in their bedroom. A child who fears that a parent is not interested in what they have to say or does not have time for them will become quieter and might avoid their parents.

Try to leave your stress at work. Just as you take your shoes off at the door or change into more comfortable clothes when you get home, shed the stress the same way. You might need to lock yourself in the bathroom for five minutes to practice deep breathing or listen to a short meditation. Vow to stay in the present when you are home with your children.

Journal your blessings.

Often, we get stressed when we focus on the future and what we do not have, such as money to pay the bills or declining health from a long-term illness. These thoughts are rooted in fear, the fear of man, and the fear of the future. Instead of dwelling on what might happen, focus on what blessings you have now.

Journaling your blessings daily lets you see how much God cares for you and your family. You can see His miracles and His hand in your life. Try journaling before bed or early morning to start your day with gratitude.

Seek help if experiencing anxiety and depression

Is your stress too much? Is it leading you to burnout, anxiety, and depression? If you struggle with dealing with stress, contact our office today. We can schedule you with a counselor specializing in family issues. Your family deserves a well-rested parent, and you deserve to prioritize yourself while you care for them. The balance is possible. Give us a call today.